“You can’t be autistic AND ADHD.” Actually, you can. Let’s bust some myths.
Why myths matter
Myths lead to missed diagnoses, poor support and a lot of self-doubt. Many AuDHD people spend years believing the stereotypes about themselves.
You can’t be what you can’t see. So let’s clear things up.
Myths about autism and ADHD do real harm. They delay diagnosis, because people who do not match the stereotype are told they cannot be autistic or ADHD. They shape how teachers, employers and families respond. Worst of all, people absorb them and turn them on themselves. Many AuDHD adults spent years believing they were lazy, difficult or overreacting, when they were simply dealing with a brain that works differently and had never been explained to them.
Myth vs reality
A quick comparison:
| Myth | Reality |
|---|---|
| “You can’t be both” | You can. Officially since 2013. |
| “We all get distracted” | Traits aren’t a diagnosis |
| “You don’t look autistic” | Autism doesn’t have a “look” |
| “It’s just a childhood thing” | Plenty of adults are AuDHD |
Stereotypes keep people from support.
More myths
- “You’re just lazy”: Executive dysfunction isn’t laziness.
- “It’s only boys”: Girls and women are often missed.
- “You can focus when you want”: Hyperfocus isn’t a choice.
- “Autistic people lack empathy”: Many feel things very deeply.
- “It’s bad parenting”: It’s how the brain developed.
What's actually true
- It’s lifelong: Support needs change, the brain doesn’t.
- Everyone’s different: No two AuDHD people are alike.
- It comes with strengths: Creativity, honesty, deep focus.
- It often runs in families: It’s strongly inherited.
- It’s not rare: Autism and ADHD often co-occur.
How to push back
- Share good sources: NHS, National Autistic Society, ADHD UK.
- Use your own words: “This is how my brain works.”
- You don’t owe proof: No one needs your diagnosis papers.
- Protect your energy: Not every myth needs correcting.
- Find affirming spaces: Where you don’t have to explain.
Where to start
You do not have to correct every myth you hear, and you do not owe anyone proof. But it helps to know the facts for your own sake. When an old label comes up in your head, check it against what you now know. Seek out people and spaces where you do not have to explain yourself.
The bottom line
Know the facts. Share the facts.
This post is for awareness, not diagnosis. Everyone’s experience of AuDHD is different.
Want the swipeable version? This post is also a carousel on Instagram: follow @johnhasaudhd for more on life with AuDHD.